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The five groom personality types and how to deal with them

How is your groom dealing with wedding planning?

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The five groom personality types and how to deal with them
What type of groom is he?

Is your groom an out and proud Groomzilla, or more of a shy, retiring type? Read on to discover his wedding planning style, and learn how to make it work for your big day…  

Groom type 1: The Groomzilla
Planning your day has unleashed a monster – meet the Groomzilla. With his own wedding day Pinterest boards (oh there are many), various spreadsheets and an ever-increasing suit budget (“But this is the guy who made Eddie Redmayne’s wedding tux…”), he’s most likely to be found furiously typing off an email to your wedding planner about how he’s leaning towards copper accents, rather than rose gold, and that he’s decided on the triple pocket napkin folds for the wedding breakfast. Woah there, boy!

Deal with it: It’s great that he wants to be so involved, but no one should be losing sleep over whether they’ve made the right decision about buttonholes. Make wedding planning as much of a team effort as you can. Schedule in fun, pressure-free time to talk through ideas together, on a lunch date or over a few weekend drinks. If all else fails, tell his mates about the wedding scrapbook he keeps under the bed; they’ll soon bring him down to earth…

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Groom type 2: The Party Animal
Ever since he put a ring on it, your groom has been talking non-stop about the wedding.
More specifically, about how much of an EPIC PARTY it’s going to be, and how he’ll be in charge of sorting the booze and the DJ and the after-party, etc, etc… You can’t fault his enthusiasm, but it almost feels as though getting married is just an excuse to throw a LOT of cash at a booze-filled afternoon for him and his mates. 

Deal with it: In fairness, a wedding is the best kind of party there is, but it’s important not to lose sight of what the day really is all about. Gently remind Disco Dave that you want to make sure everyone feels welcome on the day (Granny might not be up for that third round of tequila at 3pm), so to go easy on the drink and nip any rowdiness in the bud. Also try and get him involved in the more sentimental aspects of the day, like writing vows and planning the first dance, so he remembers what’s really important.

Groom type 3: Mr Lazy
To say he’s got a laid-back attitude to wedding planning is an understatement. This guy is more than happy to put his feet up, watch Match of the Day and ignore any requests for help or input when it comes to the big day. Ask him to email the caterer with numbers and he’ll ‘forget’, try and get him to organise a suit-shopping day with his groomsmen and he’s says he’ll ‘do it later’. Arghhhhh!

Deal with it: The temptation to accidentally-on-purpose drop your wedding planning folder on his head is strong, but there are more effective (and, err, less violent) ways of dealing with this ‘relaxed’ groom. More often than not, ‘Mr Lazy’ is just a bit clueless to how much work goes into organising a wedding. Sit him down, talk honestly with him, heck, show him the spreadsheets if you need to, and he’ll soon realise this isn’t a one-person job. Ease him in with things he’ll enjoy, like planning the music… then hit him with the bigger jobs!

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Groom type 4: The Shy Guy
Never one to be centre of attention, the upcoming wedding has turned your sweet fiancé into a nervous wreck. The thought of doing a speech brings him out into a cold sweat and he’s already thinking up ways to avoid having his photo taken on the day – the poor guy is heading into wedding meltdown. Of course he wants to marry you, but all of this fuss is starting to bring him out in hives…

Deal with it: There’s no ‘one wedding fits all’, so it’s important to plan your day to suit both of you. If your groom really is freaking out about all the attention, be sensitive to this. Perhaps it’s best to keep guest numbers for the day quite low, so he only has to say his vows and do his speech in front of your closest friends and family. Skip the first dance, or get your bridesmaids and ushers on the dance floor too, for moral support. No one wants a ‘hivey’ groom, poor lamb.

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Groom type 5: The Traditionalist
He’s never struck you as a particularly old-fashioned guy, but as soon as you got engaged your man turned into Mr Straight. Tutting at your obsession with wedding day crop tops (hot, by the way) and grimacing at talk of a burrito truck for the evening reception, he’s even been busted Googling ‘Prince William wedding’ for suit inspiration. It’s like your fiancé has turned into a walking, talking etiquette guide. Very curious indeed…

Deal with it: It can feel frustrating that your almost-Mr seems to want to do everything by the book, but give him a break – most men don’t have a clue about all the cool ways you can personalise your day, so he might just need enlightening! Talk to him about your ideas, show him Perfect Wedding (obvs) and let him know you don’t have to play by the old-school rules; your day can include anything you like.

Words by Sarah Dawson

Want more? Here are nine things grooms must not forget when getting married and grooms reveal their favourite wedding day moment

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