How to write your own wedding vows

Our guide and top tips to writing you own beautiful wedding vows

How to write your own wedding vows
Be your own Shakespeare. Image: MovieStore Collection/Rex

Struggling to write your own wedding vows? Not sure where to start? We can help! Follow our advice for heart-warming vows to get all your guests and your new husband blubbing...

Check with your officiant
First things first, check with whoever is holding your ceremony that it is okay for you to write you own vows. Some religions require that you use the traditional vows, and others allow you to write your own, as long as you include certain phrases so make sure you check before putting pen to paper.

Talk to your fiancé
Make sure you husband-to-be is happy to write his own vows too and decide on length. A bit of reminiscing together should get the creative juices flowing so have a good talk about your happiest memories and what you mean to one another.

Get drafting
Once you have written you vows leave them for a few days and then go back and re-read them. You may notice awkward phrases or think of something new to include so give yourself plenty of time to make tweaks.


Set the tone
A little humour is great, but don’t feel the pressure to get laughs. Being heartfelt and honest is the important thing so save the funny anecdotes and banter for the reception.

Think about your audience
These vows are for your husband, but remember you will have a room full of people listening too. Long-winded in-jokes or very personal details may be something you regret revealing on the day!

Inspiration is your best friend
Don’t be afraid to look around for ideas. Read vows from other religions, watch yours (and his) favourite romantic moments in movies, source lots of beautiful readings and pick all the best bits (ever thine, ever mine, ever ours!)


Timing is everything
Decide how long you want your vows to be (around one or two minutes is about right) and keep to this. This isn’t a speech so now is not the time to start thanking people!

Read aloud
Whether you want to practice them with a friend or simply to a mirror, don’t forget to read your vows aloud. Pace and rhythm sound different in your head so make sure you stand up and say those words before the day.

Last minute panic
Whatever you do, don’t leave it to the last minute. Scribbling down the a few sentences after one too many glasses of rose the night before is not the secret to romantic inspiration. Take your time and prepare!

If in doubt keep it simple
Say what you really feel. A simple "I will love you forever" is really very effective!

Want more? Here's how to avoid a cringey wedding reading and Shakespeare quotes to use in your wedding vows or speech

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